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Thread: Should we change our date?

  1. #1
    Junior Member
    Join Date
    Jun 2018

    Post Should we change our date?

    Hello! Hoping you can give me some advice - we have our wedding booked for next September, and we really liked the date we chose, although we kind of chose it randomly I suppose. It's a number that is special to us and it's on a Saturday too. We were super organised at the beginning, meaning that with just over a year to go, we have our venue, photographer, videographer, florist, caterer, band and celebrant all booked for that date.


    We haven't sent our save-the-dates yet but all close family/friends know the date - however OH's aunt announced she would be having her wedding three weeks before ours. Hers is on a Sunday, it's a second wedding (marrying outside the family - she is only OH's aunt by marriage) and likely to be v small (in a local pub so definitely not like ours), but it has irritated me that his side of the family will be attending two weddings in the same month, and ours will be the second of the two.

    Also, one of OH's groomsmen turns 30 the weekend before the wedding, and I'm worried that if he decides to have a big bash (he lives down on the south coast now, so quite unlikely, but still a worry!) then both our friends and families will be burned out by the time they get to our wedding, and it might feel quite flat.

    Finally - we really wanted to go to Japan for our honeymoon - but the Rugby World Cup is on over there, for the whole time we'd be looking at being on honeymoon, meaning it could be busier/more expensive/more stressful being there.

    Are these minor irritations and I'm reading too much into it, or would you start looking into changing your date if it were you? I like the date but I'm so worried about so much going on all around it - or would this be the case whatever date we chose?

    I don't want to push the date back any further but bringing it forward means a summer wedding, and I'm concerned that most of our suppliers may already be fully booked (and also covering the costs without the extra three months of saving we would have by keeping the original date!). Saturdays are our only option really as three members of the bride/grooms party are teachers. I don't know whether I'm just stressed and looking only at the negatives, or whether these are enough genuine reasons to seriously think about changing our date.

    Any advice appreciated! x

  2. #2
    Junior Member
    Join Date
    Sep 2017


    Hi there

    My advice would be to stick with your plan and put all thoughts of change out of your head. Presumably you would lose a significant amount of money in deposits but even if this is not a big issue for you, the hassle and inconvenience will be huge. You have said that the aunt is having a small wedding in a pub, therefore totally different to yours. If I was a guest at both, I would be looking forward to attending two completely different weddings, I'd see it really positively! As for the potential 30th party, you're worrying about something that may not even happen. If it does and folk make merry then so be it, but still no reason to change your plans. As for the honeymoon concern, why don't you plan to visit Japan the following year instead, or go and join in with the rugby fun!!

    In a nutshell I think none of these things need be an issue unless you allow them to be. You chose a date you are both happy with and you've made lots of arrangements. Imagine if you changed it and then another event came up close to your new date?! You can't control these matters so try to trust that your loved ones will value your wedding regardless of other events close to it.

    Hope that helps, let me know how you get on.

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