Results 1 to 7 of 7

Thread: Choosing a venue & general planning problems

  1. #1
    Junior Member
    Join Date
    Nov 2015
    Posts
    16

    Default Choosing a venue & general planning problems

    Hey folks,

    i apologise in in advance for the rant!

    so after being set on a venue on 3 separate occasions now I've again had my wee heart broken. We had been all set to book The Trades Hall which is incredible but the cost of it just became far too much when we added everything together. Recently we saw a small castle and looked into hiring it for a family holiday for a week and then getting married while we were there. Spoke with the owners who were all for us hiring it for a week until they heard we would be hosting a small intimate wedding. Suddenly the price was up to £6000 for 3 nights hire and the £10 a head corkage if we wanted to provide our own bar.
    is it just me that finds it so horrible that in this country as soon as the word "wedding" is mentioned the price triples?! I understand a lot of work goes into weddings however I do not want them to help plan it, provide staff, clean etc. I want to plan everything from scratch-yet it still costs me a small fortune just because it's a wedding.

    im starting to get really disheartened about the whole thing and feeling like I don't want to get married any more. Tried talking to my fiancé but he just tells me I'm stressing for no reason. We have a very strict budget and timeframe to get married in (has to be by end of 2018 as we also want to buy a house in the next 2 years)

    we looked into going abroad but the whole thing just seems like a conveyor belt and impersonal and it's incredibly important to me that the day is unique to us as a couple.

    sorry- I know I'm ranting on but it's so hard to talk to my friends about this as they aren't planning a wedding and think I'm being ridiculous. First world problems eh 🙈🙈😩

  2. #2
    Member
    Join Date
    Feb 2016
    Posts
    93

    Default

    I know right! I'v been bitching about this since I got engaged. I will say I watched a small video explaining why the prices go up at the word wedding, and at the time it made sense, but we just got hit with another charge recently. We were aware our caterers had some small print on - under a 100 guests, the price per head will be dropped slightly and an additional staffing charge will be added. So for the sake of trying to save money and not invite 100 odd people, we just got hit with an extra £900! We didnt think it was that bad when we signed the contract...woops! But while we are at that point of 'fine, we will pay it', it boggles the mind that we have less people to be served, so they need to hire less staff that night....but charge us more anyway?
    Don't lose heart though, something else will come up that just happens to suit your budget. The place I had my heart set on for 10 odd years (should anyone pop that question) turned out to be all wrong, even after careful consideration as to how we would make it work if we did go with them. Now I'm glad we didnt because of my new venue. Have you considered getting married on a week day instead? We decided to just do just that (screw those that cant make it), and we are getting our wee castle and accommodation at a third of the cost of the Saturday!

    Please do keep ranting if you need to. It'll balance out the other rants we all have to make us all look a little saner ;D

  3. #3
    Junior Member
    Join Date
    Nov 2015
    Posts
    16

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by BrideRobyn View Post
    I know right! I'v been bitching about this since I got engaged. I will say I watched a small video explaining why the prices go up at the word wedding, and at the time it made sense, but we just got hit with another charge recently. We were aware our caterers had some small print on - under a 100 guests, the price per head will be dropped slightly and an additional staffing charge will be added. So for the sake of trying to save money and not invite 100 odd people, we just got hit with an extra £900! We didnt think it was that bad when we signed the contract...woops! But while we are at that point of 'fine, we will pay it', it boggles the mind that we have less people to be served, so they need to hire less staff that night....but charge us more anyway?
    Don't lose heart though, something else will come up that just happens to suit your budget. The place I had my heart set on for 10 odd years (should anyone pop that question) turned out to be all wrong, even after careful consideration as to how we would make it work if we did go with them. Now I'm glad we didnt because of my new venue. Have you considered getting married on a week day instead? We decided to just do just that (screw those that cant make it), and we are getting our wee castle and accommodation at a third of the cost of the Saturday!

    Please do keep ranting if you need to. It'll balance out the other rants we all have to make us all look a little saner ;D
    Thank you so much for understanding! I was starting to feel like I was on a completely different planet from everyone else that I know!

    I haven't actually considered weekday as I didn't want to put people out but I might actually have another look at the bigger venues again with that in mind! I could try to find a Thursday before a bank holiday weekend so that some of the guests have the Friday off. It would also mean our guest list would be kept on the smaller side at least for the ceremony.

    How did you go about deciding on a venue? Sometimes I feel like I like them all just because I'm so desperate to have the venue booked because I hate it so much
    Part of me believes that once the venue is booked and out the way the rest of it will fall into place naturally!

  4. #4
    Member
    Join Date
    Feb 2016
    Posts
    93

    Default

    I think we need to make weekday weddings a thing! A friend of mine is getting married on a Monday in Sept! I likely should have done the same, so that people could travel down on the Sunday, just missing 2 days of work, but never mind! Tip - if you've planning on having kids in the bridal party make sure you book your day during holidays! Asking my younger stepsister to be a bridesmaid, but I'v only gone and booked the wedding while she is at school! Luckily my parents are on the case, and going to try to come to a compromise with the school about missing 2 days. If you give people enough warning (save the dates), those that really want to come will come. We can all get holidays off work! Iv you've got your heart set on a place but its too much on the Sat, check with them weekday rates. I choose my venue (carlowrie castle), because I feel in love with the place as soon as I saw it. It ticked our needs/wants boxes - private, with garden, not in the city centre and then it had the extra pluses - stunning, comes with accommadation, a 2 min drive from H2B parents house (meaning that he can get ready there in the morning, and have no issues getting to the place, and his parents can take care of our dog that day/night so she does not have to go into kennels). And yes before we went ahead and booked it, and were still viewing other places, I was a crazy mess (tears and wanting to give up/elope just by ourselves). I was desperate to have something booked, and finding things well out of our budget (one place quoted me £13K for the venue and bedrooms before food! and then ofc before everything else!!). Another wee tip, to save a few pennies here and there...if you know you some of your details which company you really want to go for (i.e. cake maker, or photographer), try to catch them at a wedding fair to book, they give you some discounts if you book there and then. We have saved £300 doing that so far.

    Let us know how your getting on finding a place, and use the forum any time you need a rant!

  5. #5
    Junior Member
    Join Date
    Nov 2015
    Posts
    16

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by BrideRobyn View Post
    I think we need to make weekday weddings a thing! A friend of mine is getting married on a Monday in Sept! I likely should have done the same, so that people could travel down on the Sunday, just missing 2 days of work, but never mind! Tip - if you've planning on having kids in the bridal party make sure you book your day during holidays! Asking my younger stepsister to be a bridesmaid, but I'v only gone and booked the wedding while she is at school! Luckily my parents are on the case, and going to try to come to a compromise with the school about missing 2 days. If you give people enough warning (save the dates), those that really want to come will come. We can all get holidays off work! Iv you've got your heart set on a place but its too much on the Sat, check with them weekday rates. I choose my venue (carlowrie castle), because I feel in love with the place as soon as I saw it. It ticked our needs/wants boxes - private, with garden, not in the city centre and then it had the extra pluses - stunning, comes with accommadation, a 2 min drive from H2B parents house (meaning that he can get ready there in the morning, and have no issues getting to the place, and his parents can take care of our dog that day/night so she does not have to go into kennels). And yes before we went ahead and booked it, and were still viewing other places, I was a crazy mess (tears and wanting to give up/elope just by ourselves). I was desperate to have something booked, and finding things well out of our budget (one place quoted me £13K for the venue and bedrooms before food! and then ofc before everything else!!). Another wee tip, to save a few pennies here and there...if you know you some of your details which company you really want to go for (i.e. cake maker, or photographer), try to catch them at a wedding fair to book, they give you some discounts if you book there and then. We have saved £300 doing that so far.

    Let us know how your getting on finding a place, and use the forum any time you need a rant!
    Thanks very much for talking me off of the ledge it was my first bridezilla moment!
    I'm gonna get the Mr to get onto this whole weekday wedding thing-I'm currently banned from venue hunting for a while for stressing too much haha!


    Your venue is beautiful I'm considering going back to the original venue and asking them for their weekday prices to see if that's still an option. We were literally about to sign the papers when we freaked out a little about the cost.

  6. #6
    Platinum Member
    Join Date
    Mar 2013
    Posts
    1,008

    Default

    I found the venue the most stressful part, that & veil shopping lol. Do you have a location in mind & search venues within that area or just sit on enight & look on the net, I done that, its’ not the most fun but you do find places you never even heard of, I looked them up online didn’t look at pics or prices but looked for the key areas we were interested in , the big one was travel for both sides as I had Glasgow & other had had west Lothian so we wanted somewhere with fair amount of travel for both sides if I saw it was ok travel I then looked further into it - I didn’t want to love a place again then realise it wasn’t going to work, which had happened & we were both gutted.

    As for your rants you haven’t even started yet, you will find the slightest wee thing will set you off but do not worry it is completely normal! Someone will say the most innocent thing & chances are you may want to rip their head off, cancel the whole thing & run away to Barbados to get married, again all normal – so embrace it!

    We got married on a Friday (football reasons believe it or not lol) & everyone was fine with it, if people want to be at your wedding & you have gave plenty of notice they won’t have a problem taking a day off if need be & if they don’t then you will not miss them anyway!

    Try get a shortlist of venues then go see them & see how you feel in them, grab some lunch (if they do it) or afternoon tea/drinks, you should know if it’s the place for you. Ask about silly things like chair covers, do you have to take the venues (they are normally a lot more expensive) make sure any packages of drinks etc are actually worth it, we were losing money on them as certain people didn’t drink what was included so we just put a tab of a certain amount to begin with. Some do package discounts & minimum numbers (lower numbers for midweek) but if you don’t meet the minimum number there will be a charge so check all that out too

  7. #7
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Aug 2015
    Posts
    104

    Default

    Hi princess, how r u getn on with venues.. I can totally relate to how u r feeling and empathise. See my posts. It's gets u down. We are hoping to get married Oct 2017. No further forward x goodluck x

    Sent from my SM-G900F using Tapatalk

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •