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Thread: Trying so hard not to worry about this

  1. #1
    Member MissLC's Avatar
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    Default Trying so hard not to worry about this

    H2B's family have had a fall out (basically his dad's brother and sisters have stopped talking to their mum, h2b's gran). I was hoping it would pass but with just under 8 months to go looks like it's getting worse rather than blowing over.

    H2B's plan is to invite them all but warn them they have to behave. We're both the least argumentative people (haven't had any fights in 6 years) so the thought of arguments and fights on our day is starting to worry me. Apparently his auntie has said that she won't be in the same room as his gran but will come and see us get married. So logically do I still make sure she has a meal in case she feels it's fine on the day? 🙈 All these wee thoughts are popping in my mind.

    also his parents aren't together and unfortunately his dad left his mum for his current wife so they don't all get on so worrying about the top table. His dad also said to me that his wife and H2B mum will be in the family photo....I don't know how it's going to work. I just said well I might not be having it traditional so don't need to be in the same photo....I just don't want anyone upset but his mum is my top priority as she's the one that's been there with me through planning etc.

    Didnt mean this post to be long and also not sure what advice I'm looking for but been good to write it all down!

  2. #2
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    Oh what a worry I think if I am honest - I'd be saying to them if they cannot put aside their differences for one day to celebrate with you both, then they won't be invited at all. It's so hard. I do think on the day everyone will be so happy for you they won't be thinking about anything else xx

  3. #3
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    I know its hard but try to be stubborn, it might all blow over, when the invites come back you can ask if they are attending all day as the venue needs exact numbers, if they want to be petty let them but confirm if the are coming or not (they will likely behave at the wedding anyway)
    as for the photos, say you want many combination's (ask each parent too) make a list to give your photographer but at the endof the day you buy the photos or your home, they will not buy them all or have an album so tell them to grow up and fall in line

  4. #4
    Advertiser KnockdowHouse's Avatar
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    Dear Ms LC
    We had a bride to be come and see us with a similar issue. Her biggest concern was the top table... between her groom and us we came up with the suggestion of doing things in a slightly different way. Rather than the formal, traditional top table, the bride and groom are going to sit amongst their guests with their maid of honour and best man. This means his dad and new partner can sit on another table with other guests and same for his mum. It will avoid anyone feeling awkward and ensure they all enjoy their day.
    I always say to brides, because things have always been done in a certain way, it doesn't mean to say YOU have to do them that way. It is YOUR special day and you should decide how you want things to be!!
    Hope it all works out for you in the end. Your wedding day is a truly special day, don't compromise too far for the sake of others!

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